Sunday, September 7, 2014

What’s Crackalakin Rodzina

This week has been pretty great. Things were pretty difficult there for a while here at the MTC, but are finally picking up again and getting good. I am really going to miss Provo, America, and the MTC when we leave but hopefully I will find a happy home in Poland. So I have been trying to see the little miracles and blessings in my life, and the more you look for them the more you see.  My comps and I are just making so many good memories and having so much fun with each other. It is such a blessing to see eye to eye with them and get along. On Monday we were having a bit of a rough day but had a huge down pour here in Provo. Since we were confined to the rez studying, and we started to hear the thunder storm from the inside of the dorm. All three of us just look at each other, jump up and throw on some pants, and go sprinting outside into the rain. It was just one of those moments when you can just smile and dance and scream and act like a free wild child once again. It sounds crazy, probably like not very much fun to everyone at home, probably against the rules too here haha. But for us here it was a miracle and blessing to go out and dance and jump and puddles. We got some pics, Then last night before bed my comps and I sat on my bunk bed on the fourth top floor of my rez and watched another lightening storm roll across the valley, it was a moment where you could just sit there and say life is good and I am so blessed. Life is so precious and we shouldn't waste a second. Finding joy in the little things is what life is about. Pretty soon I will be leaving the culture and people that I know and going somewhere completely foreign and new. It is bittersweet, but I know that the gospel is something that can bless and bring happiness to every person on this earth!!!

The longer I am out here the more I am in awe at the way God works in our lives. You would think that with how much I have been learning about myself, others, and God that I would have this figured out haha, but I sure don't. My favorite scripture is now Alma 26:12... I think that is the reference, but it just talks about having confidence in God. Like, hey I can't boast in myself because I mess up a lot, but I will boast in my God, because he is a just and loving God and through Him we can survive all things. Sometimes it is frustrating because you want answers and understanding right away. But somehow God helps us all get where we need to be, even when our faith is lacking. I have been praying so hard for experiences that will help me become completely converted to Heavenly Father and the Savior because I worry I will get to Poland and not be able to stand with my testimony when the world is railing against it. Experiences where you cannot deny the faith. The thing is that you pretty much can never be 100% sure of everything in the gospel, and part of being a part of this great plan is having enough trust in God to say... hey I may not understand this or that, but I am going to rely on you and let you help me when I do not know or are not sure. Faith is a muscle, seriously such a cheesy analogy but it is so true. You must use it or it will grow weak and fail. And it is funny because as you are trying to teach your investigators to have faith you are trying to feed yours as well. We don't have real investigators here at the MTC usually. But there have been times when I was bearing my testimony with our "investigators" that I could really feel the glory of God. The spirit is real and converts not just investigators but missionaries as well. During those moments my Polish just flows through me and I cannot deny the Christ and His message. All of His children are great in His eyes and I hope to have so much love to share with ALL of the people in Poland. With Conviction! 
Love Ellie

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