Monday, May 11, 2015

"Beautiful Growth Through Difficult Experiences"

May 11, 2015 Happy Mothers Day
Hello Everyone,

My Beautiful Family Skyping on Mothers Day
Oh boy, I can't even tell you how good it was to talk with the family yesterday. I couldn't stop talking about it for probably an hour. I would even add that it was quite constructive; I don't think I have felt so much like myself for months until skyping. Goodness why don't they let us do that more often. Like every Sunday haha, alright probably for good reasons. Ugh I cannot believe that that actually happened. It was so wonderful to actually be able to have a conversation with my family! You are the best! Love you!
Since I already divulged much of what has been going on I will just give a brief rundown of my last week. Last Tuesday we had zone training in Warsaw, which was a good reminder to me of some things I need to work on. (Pride has been plaguing me). Then I remained behind for exchanges in the wonderful land of Warsaw II, my home land!!! Back in an area that I know and love. I think I had forgotten how much I love the people in that branch. I was able to talk with Kaja, Henryk and Diana, Sławyk, and a couple other branch members and missionaries. We played soccer in the morning, white boarded at the university, ate sushi with Sam Chit, Kaja gave me a delicioius jar of homemade pickles, and so much more. It just felt so so good. The people I had the opportunity to meet and serve with there have left such an impact on me. I think I can work on building more solid relationships with people in this area and I know that Lódż will in time become a good home for me.

Lodz Branch grill. We made flower crowns.
Lately I have really been trying to look up and find that personal conversion. I have always been a decently good girl my whole life. I mostly kept out of trouble, and I have always had a genuine desire to be good. When I decided to serve a mission, one of the main things I wanted to learn was how to make my understanding of the gospel and relationship with God something much more deep and personal. I wanted my testimony to be sure and the ability and desire to help others find their own surety. Sometimes I look at my mission and worry that I have actually gone backwards in personal progress. I feel like the attributes of kindness, love, friendship, and service have in some ways diminished instead of grown. But something that I read in Sister Kosanovich
Sam Chit is so kind, she made us sushi 
's email today really struck me. Since their family is moving a lot of people have been asking her lately if their time in Poland has been "fun". Sister Kosanovich said that her time in Poland was like her mission, filled with "beautiful growth through difficult experiences". I would definitely not describe my mission as "fun" either, though I can say I have been blessed with bright billiant rays of funshine through it all. And so I know as much as I feel like a stranger in a far land, a little lost, trying to seem so strong and sure, the Lord is building me. I know that I am in the place the Lord needed me right now, thank goodness I got that information right and followed those promptings, because I am learning so much. I will return home a better woman.

Thank you so much for all of the love and prayers! Stay strong and trust in the Lord! Happy Mothers Day and have a beautiful week!

Sister Benson

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